Saturday, April 3, 2010

What Is A Father?

What is a father? For many years I have wondered that very question. What makes someone a father? What is it like to have a dad to have lunch with, help you fix things around your place, give you advice,etc. I have honestly never had that. My close friends and family members know that I grew up in divorced home. For the large majority of my life I was raised by my mom and never saw my father.

Recently though, my dad has come back into the picture and I made a decision to put the past behind me, and to try and have a good relationship with him. I couldn't be happier with my decision! We have had quite a few discussions and sorted through things in the past lately. At first I was a little cautious of getting close to him simply because I viewed him more as a stranger than as a father. I am SOOO glad I listened to the advice of some other friends and family members though and I gave him another try. Things are still a little akward and new, but everything is working out well now. Each time I talk to him is a blessing. I have seen my father more in the past two months than I recall seeing him throughout my entire life. It is such a blessing to have him be a part of my life now.

Recently he has been there for me when I lost my grandmother (Nannie). He has also been very supportive of me moving and has helped with the move and even with setting things up in the new place. He has been taking me out to lunch on occassion as well and telling me all sorts of things about his life. I have to confess that it is such a wonderful feeling to get to know my dad. For those of you who have a good relationship with your father, please remember not to take that forgranted; it is true blessing.There has always been an empty spot in my life that was never filled simply because I never really had the presence of my dad in my life. It's definitely better late than never though! I'm glad that we are starting to have a good father/daughter relationship now and that I can finally get to know him. 

I think the two most touching moments for me in the past few weeks have been when I introduced him to someone and said, "This is my father." Such a simple phrase, but it ment the world to me to say that and to have him in my life! Definitely a blessing. Today was the best though! He came over to my place around lunch-time and helped me hang pictures and put things together,etc. After that we went to get some lunch and then he dropped me off. When we were saying goodbye, he told me "I love you." Throughout my entire life I don't remember him ever telling me that; so for him to say that to me today, it ment soo much! 

I'm definitely looking foward to developing a great relationship with my dad and to seeing what the future has in store. I just wanted to share that little bit today! 

P.S. -For those of you with estranged parents that are debating whether or not to forgive them and to try and have a relationship with them....please give it a shot! you don't have anything to loose, but possibly immeserable things to gain! You might be plesantly surprised. I know I am! :)


  1. That is such a sweet post, Lydia! I am glad yall are getting to know each other and , good for you for being so open minded and forgiving!

  2. lydia I love your blogs! I am so glad you are developing a relationship with you father. You are an amazing woman though, and I'm sure it's just as rewarding getting to know you! You have a beautiful inner strength and relaxed nature that I hope he sees! I love you, chica! I'm so happy for you!