Monday, July 5, 2010


How many times have you let your nerves get the best of you? We all have our moments where we panic and overthink things. We worry about the "what if''s" in life and forget to actually breathe and enjoy the little things that really matter. I've definitely been guitly of this lately. My nerves seem to have gotten the best of me this week. In the past, I've always destressed by doing Yoga & running, but since I'm unable to do much of anything for quite a while now because of my heart, my favorite destressing tools are out of the picture- leaving me feeling frazzled at times. The chaos that goes along with planning a move, delaying school when I was soo close to graduation, and an upcomming open heart surgery seems a little overwhelming at times. I'm normally pretty laid-back and easy going. I can typically roll with the punches and not let the little upsets in life get the best of me.  So for me to be a nervous-wreck is out of the ordinary. This week I've been a basket case to say the least! After thinking things over tonight though, I'm going to make it my goal to just try and take a step back at this point and remind myself to breathe. I guess sometimes things our out of our hands (my heart surgery for example- I need it, I know I need it, yet I'm still nervous about it) I think it's during those nervewracking times that God smacks us upside the head and reminds us to be still and pray. I had one of those moments tonight.

I had a pretty decient day today- packed up some of my apartment this morning (with the help of my mom and aunt), then Jack and I went to my sister Kimmy's house for a 4th of July cook out (which wound up being a "cook in" when my brother-in-law's grill wouldn't cooperate!) It was fun. We all had a good time, but towards the end of the night, I started daydreaming and thinking about the "what if's" that could come along with my upcomming surgery. By the time my sweet boyfriend dropped me off at my apartment tonight, he knew something was up, so he asked me what was wrong. (Did I mention that Jack can read me like a book?). When I told him all of the things that were running through my head, all he did was give me a huge hug and let me know that everything would be ok. Sometimes you just need to hear from another person that you loved that one simple statement, "Everything is going to be alright". I don't know why, but it definitely helped calm me down. The next thing he said ment even more to me - he asked me if I'd prayed about it and if I prayed for my nerves to subside. I told him I'd been praying about the move/surgery/etc, but that I didn't even think to pray for my nerves. I guess sometimes we just need other people to point things out for us and to lead when we're having a moment of weakness. I am soo greatful that Jack is not only a wonderful boyfriend to me, but that he is also starting to become a strong spiritual leader in our relationship together. That means soo much to me.

I think the moral of my blog post tonight is that sometimes it's ok to admit when you're nervous, even over little things. Then, try to "let it go" and pray about it. I already feel better and more calm. So, if you have something bothering you and making you nervous- pray about it! Sounds simple, but it really does help...

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